I want to tell you a story about transformation…
Nesha and Simon have been together for 33 years. Both have had extremes in life, and I’m surprised they’re here to tell me their story. They cheekily bounce into the office with big friendly smiles. As I sit here, listening to their tale, with the sun streaming into our small lounge room at TasCAHRD, across from me I see two strong people, who are loving, and determined to have the best in life.
It was not like this when I first met them a couple of years ago.
They have chosen to live off grid, and whilst the climate is often inhospitable, the photos they show me of their bits-and-pieces home is coming together with colour and comfort and warmth…except for the occasional snake.
Nesha tells me she was an activist – as a proud gay Indigenous man – in Tassie, in the 80s.
I admit my initial confusion as a straight older white woman.
So, I pose the question….
“Nesha what pronouns would you like me to use?”
“I’m just me! I have never felt so me!”
But that’s a story for later.
Nesha worked as a volunteer at the AIDS Council in North Hobart which was just above the old Commonwealth Bank. She started a youth group called Tasmanian Young Gay Association (TYGA) to support young gay people in Hobart. Incidentally, I also worked closely with an AIDS council in the early 80’s in the Northern Territory, with no clue homosexuality was a criminal offence in Tasmania at that time. Our Gay community in Alice Springs celebrated diversity with a “no shame mantra”.
During our discussions, Nesha showed me a video of a determined group of town Councillors and Church goers in Ulverstone, attempting to ‘rid the island of these people”. There she is, outspoken and fearless! I watch the video with tears and realise how absurd and cringy this crackly video is. The link to the video is below.
Simon and Nesha met at the ages of 23 years, and not long after were diagnosed with HIV. This was in the early 90’s and Simon explains to me his feelings at the time. “I thought I’m going to be dead anyway soon, so I may as well start drinking to numb the pain.” They both didn’t stop there. Whatever was available, they used it – alcohol, speed, heroin and marijuana.
Back then, HIV treatment was limited to AZT, and it was the only available treatment at the time. It was an unpleasant drug to take and caused extreme side effects. People became very unwell.
So, from 1992 to 1999 they both made the decision not to take AZT.
After a near fatal car accident, Nesha decided her partner needed help, and Simon was admitted into a psychiatric hospital for several months with heavy sedation. Simon is virtually unable to remember this time and can only recall a couple of visits by Nesha, who visited daily. The diagnosis was paranoid schizophrenia – a common diagnosis with overuse of Marijuana.
Nesha soon became exhausted running in and out of the psychiatric hospital. She was on her own, dealing with serious family issues and was drowning with the thought of losing Simon.
Both were spiralling and had no idea of the transformation heading their way.
Part two next edition.
Video link
https://www.abc.net.au/news/2018-11-14/tasmanian-attitudes-to-homosexuality-in-1989/10497776
